Choices

Yesterday, I left the house at noon and drove to the nursing facility.  I toured the first wing which housed the memory patients.  It was what I expected...mostly women in wheelchairs off in their own little world.  The residents were finishing lunch.  Christmas trees were still displayed.  The rooms are semi-private, a small narrow hospital bed, dresser.  I can't visualize my mother on this floor.  The other wing was nicer.  The residents were up and about...reading, one was doing a puzzle.  The criteria to live in this unit is to know when to use the call button.

I drove from the nursing home to my parents' house.  When I got there, my mother's aide was just leaving and we chatted for a few minutes.  My mother had no pain medications and because she hurt so badly, she had great difficulty getting out of bed.  Her aide said that it was a bad day.  And the hospice nurse had gotten delayed and wouldn't be there for two hours.  The nurse arrived and my sister motioned for both my dad and me to be quiet.  She did not get a true picture because my mother did not mention that she is a shut-in and has mobility issues.  This information came out at the end.  However, it does not look like hospice can help.  The nurse suggested to make an appointment with the doctor and pain management medications.  Also suggested a hospital bed and a raised dinner tray.

I stayed for awhile after the nurse left and made dinner.  My mother could swallow the soft foods...mashed potatoes, peas and applesauce, whipped chiffon dessert.  However, she could not manage the meat, even though it was soft and tender.  Have to figure out what she can eat.  I will experiment with small curd cottage cheese and crushed pineapple, sugar-free yogurt and pureed bananas, the kind infants eat, and my mother's recipe, Yankee Doodle Soup.

I was not sure that my father could eat this meal.  I was afraid that it would upset his stomach.  I plan to go over to the house today, and will ask him how he feels.  My father enjoyed watching the local and world news.

The first order of business is get the pain under control so that mother is more comfortable.  and to get more help for my father.  He cannot manage any longer.  He has health issues of his own.  We need to weigh the choices and make the best decision for both my mother and dad.

A spring broke in my father's favorite chair.    We decided to move the chair from the den into the living room.  Only thing is that chair has flared arms.  We tried to move it out....wouldn't fit through the door.  My dad took the door off and by lying the chair on its side, and finagling this way and that we managed to get it free.  It looks nice, and it reclines and has a foot rest!

I will go to the store and buy some soft foods and then go to the house to talk with my mother's aide and check on my mother and dad.  I was up early, because lying in bed made my head hurt.