New Day

I was out in the fresh air yesterday, and came home tired.  So I fell asleep immediately about 10:30pm.  I slept for perhaps 3 hours when the puggle decided he needed a romp outside.  I let him out and then do you think I could fall back asleep?  Of course not!  At 2:30 am, my husband got a text message and the theme from Star Wars sounded throughout the room.  The wind or cat caused the door to open and the noise startled me.  The radio alarm clock fell off the nightstand.  And my husband got up and wandered to the back door because he thought he heard one of the dogs barking to get in.  Not to mention several trips to the bathroom.  My mind was twirling and dancing and sadly, I could not get to my "happy place" so that I could fall back asleep.  My thoughts were not comforting.  Finally toward early morning, I drifted off.

It's pleasant walking down the street and greeting the neighbors.  One introduced himself and invited me to attend fitness classes at the rec center.  He said that some people need company for motivation.  As an added bonus, it's free!  Today I walked 10,000 steps, rode the exercise bike, went up and down the stairs 10 times.

A friend organized a get-together at the library.  Some of us will be practicing Spanish and others will be learning English.  I am looking forward to it.

My daughter's softball team got clobbered (double header) yesterday and coach was not  happy.  I could tell my daughter was upset when she came home, but respected that she didn't want to talk about it.  So I made comfort food...tuna with crackers, strawberries and whipped cream, carrots and celery with ranch dressing.

I know the coach is frustrated.  My daughter told me at the beginning of the season that she thought her team was good.  The team has won 3 and lost 9.  It's a combination of problems--the pitcher walking batters, no offense and errors.  I appreciate all the hard work the coach and his staff have put in with the girls.  Today is a new day.  Will the team win?  Anything is possible.

Snowing

I rode the health rider for 30 minutes and then headed out into the rainy, snowy day to walk 10,000 steps.  By the time I got home, my jacket was soaked!  I have been riding and walking for 8 days now, only missing one--the day of my daughter's game. There was no possible way to get the exercise in as my boss asked me to stay late, i was at the game til 8pm, came home, fixed something to eat.

I wish I were more tech savvy.  I was so preoccupied when my mother was in the nursing home, running up there all the time, that twice I forgot to zip my carry bag, and my Asus tablet and dock fell out onto the floor.  The metal is fine where the adapter plugs in and by the USB port, so when it hit the floor, the metal split.  It worked  for a minute, but suddenly I can't charge through the dock.  I believe it is a matter of moving the connector device in the dock more toward the outside so the plug will connect.  It's not just hardware that I have trouble with.  I try to install apps and I believe the process in interrupted so the apps don't work properly.  I uninstall them and then install them a 2nd or 3rd time.  Now too, since I updated, I have a glitch on the kindle app.  I will be reading and then the app freezes.  Found out that if   I open another book, and then return to the original book, I can forward the page. 

The Game

So, I've worked out a manageable and realistic exercise routine.  I enjoy hapkido--it wards off Alzheimers and keeps me moving--but unless it is fitness day, it is not terribly aerobic.  So I have a plan to ride the exercise bike for 30 minutes and then walk 10,000 steps  Now this is the story problem.

I walk from one corner of my block (down the street) to the other corner and then back to where I started.  And to keep track, I pick up a small pebble and put it in my pocket when I have completed one trip down and one trip back.  I pick up 4 small pebbles.  Then I repeat the process (walk from one corner to the other and back to where I started from) and set the pebble down.  I continue this til all 4 pebbles are out of my pocket.  The question is how many trips do I make up and down the block?

The softball coach made my daughter cry after the game last evening.  It was a series of unfortunate events.  The pitcher was not having a good afternoon, there were errors, the girls got called out on 3rd strikes, some players did not know what to do with the ball.  She also got the impression that he did not want them to smile and laugh after a good batting sequence because the team was losing.  I don't know where coaches and trainers think they can laugh at and make disparaging remarks about a student.  I never hear a positive comment about any of my techniques or forms.  I don't agree with this philosophy.

I walked to the fence today and noticed daffodils and hyacinths blooming and green poppy leaves growing.  I also am considering planting shade loving plants in the area that was formerly a sandbox.

Talked to my coworker

My coworker has been assisting with care for my mother.  She will soon graduate from university...has possibly one class to take yet.  She is excited about pursuing a career in forensic anthropology or global wellness.  My Dad told me to tell her that it will not be necessary for her to help after Tuesday.  Today at work I thanked her for all the help that she had given and told her that my mother is doing well.  We also confirmed that her job will end after her shift on Tuesday.    It went well.  She acknowledged that my mother got upset with all the aides, nurses and therapists coming and going.  She seemed relieved to be finished and eager to pursue a job in her field.  Another hurdle jumped.

My coworker

I asked my coworker if she would like a part-time job sitting with my mother who has alzheimers.  She has been working the last two weeks or so.  Yesterday, my dad informed me that another aide has become available and it is not necessary for my friend to care for my mother any longer.  Now I need to tell her that her job with my mother is at an end.  I feel badly...hope it does not put her in dire financial straits.  Perhaps it will be a positive in her life.  She graduates from university soon and can concentrate on a job in her field.

Not Afraid

With the rest of the country, my heart goes out to the thousands or even millions of people touched by the Boston tragedy yesterday.  Physical and psychological injury yet again.  It will help if the identities of the perpetrators can be determined.  However, the fact that terrorists or ill people prey on the innocent will not stop me from enjoying pleasures of life.  I will continue to walk the Mackinac Bridge on Labor Day, even though I realize some nut job could be waiting to blow up the bridge and hurl me into the lake.  I always take precautions and use common sense.  I don't invite trouble, but I am not afraid to live either.  Could I be in the wrong place at the wrong time?  Absolutely.  Could I be the innocent victim of a demented mind?  Yes.  Will that stop me from going out?  NO

Surprises

 
 
 
Last year, one of the store owners gave me some hyacinth bulbs.   I planted them last spring and promptly forgot about them.  I came home and noticed the beautiful blue and pink flowers in bloom.  A couple were thirsty and I had siphoned water from the aquarium, so gave them a fish-water drink

Analysis

The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, they say.  My dad is always going on about fairness, especially in regard to the way he treats my brother, sister and me.  So, it's easy to see why I would be so focused on fairness, especially at work.  It does little good however, as my manager is anything but fair, life is not fair.  However it does explain a lot.

Then I have this "nose out of joint syndrome."  My sister told me in late February during a 45 minute rant "to take care of everything" with regard to my parents.  Consequently, I find it difficult some times to let go.  Perhaps it is not so much that someone is stepping on my toes, as a difficulty in relinquishing responsiblity.

I am tired of being the object of people's displeasure.  In hapkido, the constant barrage of corrections.  With my husband, derogatory comments.  At work, i come into the office to make a copy and am told i must knock, because i scared the owner half to death.  Is this life--nothing complimentery, but constant put downs?  Makes one want to live on an island.

I have dropped my tablet and dock, and damaged the charging unit on the dock.  I can only charge through the tablet.

New Ramp

Handicap Accessible

All this, because there are two steps, count them two steps from the family room into the kitchen and my mother is not consistent enough to walk them.  It is not easy to get her in and out of the house, at least not this first adventure  Started toward the front door there, only to realize that we couldn't make the turn to get to it.  So relocated some furniture as we were heading out to a doctor appointment  There is a slight bump at the thresh hold making it terribly hard to get to the deck.  And then have to go first left and then right, to turn the chair facing the right way.  We made it down, my dad helping me in case gravity took over, and we went flying.  Makes me wish i was strong enough to roll the wheelchair backwards up two silly steps

Building a Deck

My dad designed a handicap accessible ramp for his front door.  The plan is to cover the concrete porch with decking and build a ramp that extends straight from the porch for about 10'.  The ramp will then make a right-angle turn and extend for 20' to the driveway.  My dad, brother, and brother-in-law worked all day Monday and constructed some of the first phase.  When I called the house today, my dad was outside working on the project, so I drove to the house to offer my services.  I helped dig a 44" x 48" trench.  The ramp is to have four joists under the decking and for the decking to be even with the concrete driveway.  I also held 2 x 4s in place so that my dad could screw them to the posts.  I enjoyed the time with my dad.  It is a nice change from visiting with my mother who has Alzheimer's.

Solitude

Solitude
Sitting by myself.
Relishing my time alone.
Organizing thoughts.

Enjoying time alone

I shopped, worked, attended church services, cooked and visited with family last week.  This morning I drove my daughter to the airport and am now  home alone. The sun is shining, fluffy white clouds dot the sky, my dogs are quiet, the dryer is tumbling.  I revel in having time to gather scattered thoughts.  I haven't had much time to do this for several weeks.  As a matter of fact, my prayer for the last few weeks when preoccupation was the key, was "Lord, please help me to stay focused and not do something stupid."  It is wonderful to sit at my kitchen table, to write, to enjoy my own company, to find my lost self.   I am soothed by the solitude.