A Memorial Service and a Graduation Party

This morning we drove to the retirement center to attend a memorial service for my aunt.  My aunt and uncle had eight children, two by my uncle's first marriage, three by my aunt's first marriage and three children together. At my uncle's funeral many years ago his children talked about how there was no half children or step children, they were all my uncle's children.  Likewise today, a family unit blended together.  I so enjoyed hearing the memories of my aunt shared by a son and her granddaughter.  My aunt had a sense of humor, she created wedding dressings and summerwear, she baked cinnamon muffins.  She had a terrific sense of humor. The chapel had standing room only.  Seeing the overcrowded lunch room, my cousins, brother, sister and I left to eat at a restaurant.  I then drove to work where I lament that I mistook one cousin for another, commented a thought on hair color aloud and just felt that I was socially inept.  And now my coworker wants me to drop by to her great granddaughter's graduation party.  I hope all goes well with my social skills.

Plants and Flowers

At the front of the house, I planted three pots with impatiens.  I also have a combo pot that my children gave me as a gift.  In one of the beds in front of the deck I have lemon balm and a mum.  On the other side, I planted a hosta, several kalanchoe, and a hydrangea.  I wintered two poinsettia in the house from previous years and they are in full bloom. And way in the backyard by the fence, I planted several hosta, azalea and a hydrangea.  In early spring the garden is full of tulips, hyacinth and daffodils.  It has rained a lot this spring, and the plants are thriving.   I am so pleased and delighted with the flower beds.

A member of a U, not a circle

 I read an article today, which corresponds to my thinking of late.  I work with a woman who forever talks about herself as a victim.  I am absolutely not going to be like her.  I recognize that my situation in life is my own doing.  Consequently I can change my life circumstances and this brings me joy and hope. Now a circle of friends, because it is closed, excludes people. A horseshoe, and I so enjoy working with horses, or the letter U is open-ending, in process, growing... Everyone is welcome, differences are appreciated.  Difference is the spice of life.

Quality, not quantity

I  feel relief when a stressful situation is resolved.  I sing the old Easter song, "The strife is o'er, the battle done."  When my Dad's life consisted of constant visits to the hospital for infusions, blood counts, lung aspirations, he told me, "It's about the quality of life, not the quantity."  So many young mothers have died recently.  A young mother with three children the youngest only a few months old.  Another mother with a 5 year old son passed of breast cancer.  A customer came to the store yesterday to purchase funeral flowers for his 42 year old wife.  These families are grieving, trying to adjust to a life without their loved one.  Two friends that I work with are going through  traumatic times.  One friend has a toddler niece with DIPG.  The other is dealing with her husband's pancreatic cancer.  A time to be born, a time to die.  Some at 2 years of age, others at 42, my father at 92.  Should I die tomorrow, I have no regrets.  Celebrate my life.

Mother's advice

In my growing up years, I longed to have friends.  I envied fictional character Nancy Drew's friendship with Bess and George and Trixie Belden's close relationship with her adopted brother Jim and her friend Honey.  I was awkward and introverted and never knew the proper thing to say. I lived outside the city.  Today I eat dinner with two friends every Wednesday. My husband and I visited a store yesterday and enjoyed ourselves.  He has a hearing impairment so conversing is difficult.  I am making more effort to nurture friendships.  I reach out with text messages.  I discovered that I can gather more information if I listen to someone, even though I know what they are going to tell me.  I compliment people so that they feel special.  The challenge is that  I work alone at a store so I am by myself.  When I go out for a walk, I am by myself with two dog companions.  I realized today that when I have the opportunity to reach out that I am following my mother's advice from long ago. "In order to have friends, you have to be a friend."