It is what it is

Well, snap, my writing just disappeared! Today I am tired, tired of counting carbs, servings of calcium and calories. Or, maybe I'm just tired in general. I am feeling contrary. I normally watch my diet, but the minute the doctor specifically limited the number of carbs, I find myself resisting. It's like wanting to use the car, only because it's not available. Or wanting a big helping of meat because it's a Friday of Lent. But, I have been counting, and I did resist eating a snack at bedtime last night. I've lost a bit of weight. I really do appreciate the conscientiousness of my doctor, especially since diabetes and obesity run in my family. I am working toward getting my weight in the normal range which means a weight loss of 15-25 pounds. In another blog, I wrote that I wanted to look like a ninja warrior, and this should motivate me. Frankly though I am not the happiest person today. I am looking forward to vacation. Rain is in the forecast with the sun scheduled to shine the day we depart. Figures. It is what it is, and I hope we have a good time anyway. Would it be asking too much for good weather the five days that I'm up north?

Vacation

On Thursday, in three short days, I am going on vacation. We are heading to the State Park, 270 miles from home. We will be staying in our Palomino pop up--our home away from home. My husband and I drive together, and my father and his dog, Rosa, pull his travel trailer with his truck. To get my mother up quicker, my eldest daughter drives her up. It's a mini family reunion. My recently married daughter will come up with my niece and her family on Friday, and on Saturday my youngest son and daughter, nephew and a niece arrive, with last, but not least, my brother driving up Sunday. We relax in the sun, swim in the lake, take short excursions around the area, cook and sit around a fire. It's a reprieve from work and daily living. The trailer is packed with sleeping bags, chairs, and other camping equipment. Just have to pack personal items and food. Praying for safe travel, good health and a happy time for all.

A Balancing Act

So, I'm in a good mood. But yesterday, I went over my 1200 calorie limit. Tried to figure out where the calories came from. Now, I'm using My Fitness Pal to record my food, and it is easy to input incorrect information. I'm balancing carbs, calories and calcium. Ha! The three Cs! I discovered that I had too many servings of grains, dairy and meat--the sources of the 326 extra calories. So today, I need to be cognizant of the three Cs! Tomorrow, we are picking up our daughter at the train station and then heading out to the lake for a family reunion. It is important to attend the picnic and visit with all the relatives. I never know if this will be the last time to make a memory. My aunt and her son in law passed away a few years ago, and I have wonderful memories of chatting with both of them. My cousin passed away a month ago suddenly from lung cancer.

Healthy Eating

Carb Counting

Diabetes runs in my mother's family. My grandmother died at a very young age from a diabetic stroke, and my mother and her sister have diabetes. So, when my sugar level came back at 109 (instead of less than 100), my doctor gave the nurse diabetic information to give to me. I have to count carbs, no more than 50 mgs per meal and a snack of 15-30 mgs. Now yesterday I felt "off balance." Could be that I skipped a meal on Wednesday and began lowering the carb count. I was coping fairly well, until my friend came in with a steak and cheese sandwich from a restaurant. He had his stomach banded, and after eating 1/4 of the sandwich, he didn't want any more, so gave it to me. I put it in the refrigerator but later in the day, became hungry and ate it. Now the sandwich could have counted as the snack but after dinner I had two more snacks--cheese popcorn and 1/4 cup ice cream. Yesterday, I felt sad, but my mood seems to be much better today, so after the false start yesterday, I believe that I can stick to the recommended mgs of carbs. I wouldn't want the carbs so much if I wasn't told that I couldn't have them! After the rain moved on, I walked my two dogs around the field. No one else was about, so I could enjoy some solitude. I plan to walk them again tonight after dinner Dinners are a problem, because my husband enjoys processed food. Hard to watch my carb count when food is mixed in a casserole. That is a concern along with darkness coming earlier, and no safe way to walk my dogs and get my exercise. In the winter darkness falls at 5pm and I have to work until 6pm.

Summer

Because the weather is cool, it doesn't seem like summer. I read about young workers on the island heading back to college and I thought, "Wait a minute! Summer is just beginning!" But in actuality, fall will begin on October 21! One week from today, we will head to the State Park to camp for a few days. I enjoy swimming, eating outdoors, walking and sitting around the fire, but many businesses close for the season on Labor Day, so I know fall and winter are just around the corner. Now fall is a colorful season with the leaves changing, cider and donuts and football games. All too soon, fall is gone and the cold dark days of winter settle in. When I recognize that I'm "sundowning," I turn on lamps and make a warm drink. The coziness helps me through that difficult period. I had a meeting with a nurse yesterday, specifically to compare my blood pressure machine with her manual one. As always, my BP was high. She spoke to me about taking 2000 units of vitamin D, and about my blood sugar. It checked at 109 and less than 100 is normal. So now I have to count carbs.

Giving off vibes?

On Monday, we lined up to start hoi jeon moo sool, and I was surprised when the master came up and said, "I know you were frustrated on Wednesday," (that was the day I drove home seriously considering giving up the sport) and then he demonstrated the technique. I don't know that I gave off "frustration vibes" and I know positively that I didn't say a word, so then how did he know? Happily, at class I did improve on the first part of the technique, the grip. We will see how it goes. If I decide that it would be a waste of time, effort and money, I will tell my instructor that I will not be testing for a black belt.

Blue skies in August

Tired, I suppose

I drove back from hapkido and considered if it was time to give up the sport. Some forward progress, but still a plethora of errors. Maybe, just maybe, it's time to throw my hat into the ring. As with any sport, the biological clock tick, tick, ticks, and eventually the alarm goes off. It's two days later and I am practicing, thinking I was tired, I had worked all day and practiced for an hour before class. I am trying to incorporate the corrections into the techniques, draw similarities between them, and get them safely under my belt. I will continue for awhile, reevaluate my position, and try to make a decision. The grandmaster is coming from Canada for the testing, to see the style of hoi jeon moo sool that my master teaches. Our representative should be our key member, our 3rd dan.

Yearly check ups scare me

I went for my yearly check up on Wednesday afternoon. And even though I like my doctor and she doesn't intimidate me, I was scared to death, and consequently my blood pressure reading was terrible. It did manage to go down slightly to 138/90. I tried to go to a "happy place," but couldn't seem to find one, and as the cuff tightened and hurt my arm, I realized that the reading was not going to be good. So I checked out and then headed to the lab to have blood drawn for glucose, cholesterol, vitamin D and hepatitis tests. A couple referrals for a dexascan to check bone density for a pre-osteoporosis condition and a mammogram. And since I like to get everything out of the way, a visit to the eye doctor. In a couple weeks, I will be finished with these doctor visits. And hopefully, I will not have to go back to the clinic for another year!

Manchester United and Real Madrid

For the past week, crews have been setting up tents in preparation for the big game between Manchester United and Real Madrid. Banners blow in the breeze, a Chevy truck sits high on a platform and the fence is covered with posters. My son, daughter and her husband are at the Big House ready to cheer on Manchester United. It's slow at work, because either people are at the game or hiding out in their homes. The sun is shining, temps are in the 80s--a fine day for futbol!