The Life I Live by Rory Feeks

Yesterday I wanted to know how Joey Feeks was doing. She is dying from cancer. Happily she was feeling good and spent Christmas with her husband, daughters and extended family. Her husband, Rory Feeks writes on his blog, "The Life I Live." Each blog is headed by a photo with Rory's thoughts underneath. His most recent blog concerns the fears that Joey confronted in the last few weeks. The photos are beautiful, Rory's thoughts honest and thought provoking. My wish for this family, their friends, and all their fans...that they may find peace in the difficult days ahead. I know when my mother was in rehab, my siblings and I were at odds over her treatment, my father was feeling stressed that, though feeling peaceful did not change any of the issues and difficulties, it did make coping much easier.

"I want to give you something."

Everyone on this earth is carrying a burden, dealing with issues, trying to cope. We cope in different ways...turn our problems over to a higher force, meditate, run away from them, hoping life's difficulties will not catch up with us. A few weeks before Christmas as I was mulling over keeping the cost of Christmas down, I read that it is not my job to make someone else happy. How free this realization made me! And today I read that everyone holds the key to happiness in their own pocket. My husband, dad and brother are not happy people. My husband and dad are bored and need some spice in their lives, and my brother is dealing with a difficult marital situation. My husband and I were having a discussion the other day and he told me that he "wants to give me something." I was rather taken aback and commented, "I have everything I need. I have you." One of my favorite Christmas season pasttimes was to sit with my husband and watch "happy ever after" Christmas movies. I enjoy visiting with my Mother and Dad on Tuesday afternoon and remembering the good old days. I am happy walking my dogs either around the field and through the woods or around the neighborhood. I like looking at the colors of their dog sweaters and new harnesses, Pudges sweet puppy face and Maui's silky fly away ears. I spend Sunday morning regrouping at a church service. I am happy when I can help customers at the flower shop and I get endomorphins when I participate in hapkido, ride my horses or attend kickfit classes. Did my husband mean he wants to give me a material gift, something to be bought or did he mean he wants to share a meal out or do an activity together?

My Dad's Dream

My 89 year old father wants to take a road trip. He would like to purchase a small trailer and head west with my brother. He would visit the Hoover Dam, Grand Canyon, the four corners and California. He has never seen these sights before. The trip would take 3-4 weeks. My brother would have to find someone to take care of his dogs. We would have to arange care for my mother. My dad is tired of his day to day existence and needs some zest in his life. Now to see if we can make this happen!

Lab results are good

I received the results of the bloodwork and it is all normal. AC1, LDL, HDL and vitamin D. Merry Christmas to me! I am extremely pleased. Still have to get a mammo in January and barring any problem, should be set for another year. I have to exercise for 30 minutes five times a week. I am short a couple sessions. I bundled up myself and the dogs and we walked through the woods and around the field in the sleet. I ran into an old friend at the store and we had a heart to heart. So happy to catch up with her life! It was a sad day at the store. Two families came in to buy special flowers for a 19 year old who took her own life. A man sent flowers to his wife who is here to be near her disabled son who has pneumonia and is in intensive care. Another man is hoping 2016 is happier than the past two years when he lost his brother and his daughter. My friend said that there are a lot of deaths around Christmastime.

Problem Solving

So amidst the orders for Christmas centerpieces and decorative poinsettias, folks come into the store seeking help for a project. A customer purchased a pot of decorative greens for her front porch and wanted to cover it with foil. So we had to visualize the pot and the amount of foil needed. After cutting 6 feet, I showed her how to tape it together so that it would cover the sides of the pot. A young college student came into the store looking for a box large enough to hold silk poinsettias and other flowers. Not understanding at first, I went upstairs and came down with a rose box. It was way too small; she needed a box that our roses come in from the vendor. I told her how to cut the box and cover down. Today two young men came in to get a small bouquet. One was making a gift bear. He had put earrings on the bear and was planning to add a bouquet of roses, babies breath and greens. These projects keep me on my toes!

Alive and kicking

So you'll be glad to know that I made it through my doctor's appointment! Of course, my blood pressure was through the roof (168/104), but when I took it this morning 138/86. The nurse told me that I need to be under 150/90. The doctor is concerned because she can't know how much it rises during normal activity, how prone I am to a stroke. Well, I don't want to have a stroke, so I will monitor my pressure for 4 weeks and call the nurse with the readings. We will then assess whether or not I need bp meds, but not atenolol because it is a beta blocker and makes me tired. There are other options available. I also begin the pre diabetic support group on Sunday, and perhaps if I lose some weight, my blood pressure will be better. On the positive side, I have never experienced headaches and double vision. I surmise I have the worse case of white coat syndrome possible. I had a small spot removed from my leg and it is rather painful today. The wound did not want to stop bleeding, so the doctor told me no running or hopping in hapkido. I did low impact martial arts last night, but I'm hoping to participate in kickfit tonight. I had a talk with my dad. The nurse is coming on Monday to evaluate him for home health care. He wants to cut back on his driving and I told him that I could help on my day off. He wants to stay at his home and not go to assisted living.

Sales bonus at work

You probably heard about Hilcorp Corporation employees getting a $100,000 bonus. Amazing! The president of our company is offering us a sales bonus. If we sell a gift or arrangement at $80, we receive $1. We get $2 for a gift or arrangement at $100. To date, I've made $5. The bonus ends Christmas Eve so I have several more days to accrue a fortune. On December 21, our daughter arrives. I will get up early and drive about an hour away to the train station to pick her up. We ae looking forward to baking her Grandma's gumdrop cookies and sugar cookies. I really enjoy a yummy sugar cookie slathered in colorful confectioner's sugar. Of course this cookie loaded with sugar will wreak havoc with my clean eating. I did get accepted into the pre diabetic program and probably will begin the program in the next few weeks. It was my son in law's birthday and I baked him a cake and had to test it! On the positive side, I have not been eating chips or chocolate, so about 90% of the food I eat is healthy. Off for a physical on Wednesday. I always feel anxious when I head to the clinic. And the anxiety makes my blood pressure high. I have the worse case of white coat syndrome. And just like the auto repair shop, one takes their car in for an oil change and comes out several hundred dollars later with new calipers. One goes to the clinic for a check up and comes out needing a heart valve replacement.