Such a Little Thing, Really

Yesterday afternoon, as I always do, I drove to my parents' home to help serve and clean up dinner. My mother who has dementia, wanted to know why it took me so long to get there. My dad was frustrated with her and said, "I want to go away and never come back." My mother had been begging him to eat dinner since 1pm. She did have a snack, but she wanted dinner. Perhaps she could smell the roast and potatoes and became confused. I served dinner, roast, cauliflower, potatoes and gravy, tea and we all enjoyed our dinner. My dad, who was bothered with stomach pain (we think because he took pain reliever for a headache) felt some relief after eating. My mother enjoyed looking at the neighbor's Christmas lights and commented on the colors. Then my dad mentioned that he wanted to send those neighbors a Christmas card, They moved in recently, a mother, father and baby girl. Pretty soon, my dad brought out Christmas cards, return address labels, stickers, stamps and the address book that my Mother made back when, her words, "I was smart." I addressed the cards, put on the return address labels and the stamps and my dad signed the cards and sealed the envelopes with stickers. My mother hopes that by sending out these Christmas cards, they will receive cards in the mail. I addressed a dozen envelopes to their brothers and sisters, neighbors and a couple cousins. It took perhaps a half hour. And yet, by their gratefulness and joy, you would have thought I'd given them the world. It really is the small things that make a difference.

Pre diabetic support group

Last year, my blood work up showed that my glucose level was 109. The number raised a flag with my doctor as my mother has type 2 diabetes. I received some information on carb counting and the "great plate" and for about three months did very well. But a year ago, I fell off the band wagon and haven't been able to climb back on. A couple days ago I received a letter from my insurance company. Insurance will cover the cost of a pre diabetic support program. I have applied for an online program. It involves three months of weekly meetings and several monthly meetings. I will have a support group and health coach. The program will help me stay accountable. I am grateful for this support. On the positive side, I am informed about clean eating, I have my sugar addiction under control at the present, I am counting carbs. I am motivated My husband eats the healthy food I prepare along with other not-so-healthy treats. His sweet tooth tempts me to indulge in foods loaded with carbs. I really would prefer to not have cookies, chips and the like in the pantry. It's hard for me to stay strong. I hope I stay motivated as I feel so much better with more energy.

They will live on

Another senseless slaughter in San Bernadino, California. Innocent lives lost and many injured. There is speculation as to motive as if a reason would make this horrible killing more understandable. It will never make sense to me. The bombing of a plane and its crash into the desert, the rampage in Paris, shooting fellow workers at a party... what is going on in the twisted minds of the perpetrators? Many lost and the lives of family and friends changed forever as they grieve and go on, putting one foot in front of the other to get through the day. So much sadness. And there, but for the grace of God, go I because it would be so easy to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. These senseless killings encourage me to celebrate Advent, the four weeks before Christmas and Christmas and the New Year with even more fervor. I celebrate for those who can no longer enjoy the special moments in life. Evil stole these lives but these men, women and children will live on in memories and celebrations of their lives.

Never forgotten

My thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends of those who have died in the past year. I pray for Aylan's father and relatives, the little boy, who along with his mother and brother, drowned in the Mediterranean when their boat capsized. I remember the family and friends of one of my students, who at the young age of 20, committed suicide last week. I pray for the family and friends of the little boy with the brain tumor who also passed last Monday. I remember my two coworkers (grandmother and granddauughter) who lost a mother and daughter to cancer last month. So many empty chairs in peoples' homes. I think of those who have lost beloved pets--a horse, dog or cat. Peace and comfort to those who are burdened with the terrible weight of grief. May their loved ones live on in memories, in the whisper of the wind, in the twinkling of the stars.

In charge of my happiness

My 89 year old father likes to reminisce. When I "visit" on Tuesday (actually serve and clean up dinner) he will tell stories of his boyhood or the early years of parenting. He tells of spending the summer in a small cabin on the lake or camping in the north. I never realized that he had been offered a position that would have given him a substantial salary, but that he turned it down, becauuse he figured that less stress and family time were more important than money. He tells me of camping, "It didn't cost much money, but we had a good time." I wouldn't trade the special day last Wednesday with my mother and niece for any amount of money. We went to the nail salon and the flower shop to see the Christmas trees. Spending time with friends and family at my nephew's historical home, chatting, joking, laughing and then playing Phrase Party with my children, niece, great nieces and great nephew (10 of us playing the game) created priceless memories. A few weeks ago, I read that it is not my job to make other people happy. And this idea was reaffirmed yesterday at the Thanksgiving dinner by my sisters-in-law. I am grateful for family and friends, for the many blessings that I have. I am happy when I bundle my dogs into their sweaters and walk a mile on a sunny day or under overcast skies with rain sprinkling on me. I am outside walking past the pizza store and the chicken restaurant. I work in a shop with beautiful storefront windows. I can sip a hot carob drink with a dollop of whipped cream, with my tablet in my hand, in front of the electric fireplace. I ride my horse, Hope, (actually my teacher's horse) and trot around the arena, or trot diagonals or half circles. I learn martial arts and participate in kickfit classes. I listen to pop music on the radio. So I am content and peaceful, and in charge of my happiness.

Thanksgiving and Family Reunion

Today we celebrated Thanksgiving with my husband's family--his two brothers and their spouses and my niece, nephew and their families. My sister in law baked the turkey and I made the side dishes--butternut squash, mashed potatoes, yams, green bean casserole, fresh cranberry sauce, salad, ham rolls. In hindsight, I am glad I didn't have to deal with the turkey, because our refrigerator is not working properly. We need to call the appliance technician. After dessert, we played a rousing game of Phrase Party. Lots of noise and laughter.

Fun on a Rainy Afternoon--A Girls' Day Out!

My niece, 87 year old mother and I went on an adventure yesterday. My mother had an appointment at the nail salon for a manicure and to get her toenails cut. It was rainy--my niece got wet walking from the bus stop to the house. My dad parked his car outside so that I could drive into the garage. We bundled my mother into her coat and her rain bonnet. The wind promptly tore the bonnet off her head and we had to make a quick catch. At the salon, my niece and mother looked at nail colors. My mother chose a luxurious red shade. The nail technician was quick and efficient. My niece and I convinced my mother to get her toenails cut. She was afraid that her feet would get cold, so we asked the technician to take off one shoe and sock at a time, so mother would have only one cold foot! When her nails were dry, the nail artist carefully helped my mother into her coat and buttoned it for her. It seemed to me that this shop honors and respects the elderly. We were close to the flower shop so we stopped by to browse. Mother enjoyed looking at the ornaments on the trees, the plants and flowers in the greenhouse, the flowers in the refrigerator and the cards. All my work colleagues came to greet her and welcome her to the shop. She said, "they are very kind." Once back at the house, we had a snack as we talked about the memories we made on a rainy Wednesday afternoon.