Covid changed me

I have changed this past covid year.  Social and mainstream media, commercials on radio and TV weigh heavily upon me--a great burden causing depression.  I have developed a phobia about riding and no longer ride.  I listen to music on cassettes and cds.  I take flower orders over the phone and  help with curbside delivery.  I shop at the department store.  I babysit my grands.  I just started attending church services after almost a year.  There are no hymnals, the music and lyrics are on my smartphone., I walk my old dog.  I clean up the yard.  I visit with my two local adult children.  I play a golf game on the PS4 a couple times a week.  I cook dinner, serve and clean up after.  I work out virtually with my sister and daughter once a week and by myself the other days.  I wasn't exercising as often as  I needed and just today did cardio and resistance bands.  I am doing just fine.  Every one of my orchid plants is in bloom.  One is struggling because the poor baby was thrown in the garbage at work and then knocked over by my cat at the house.  The green shoots of bulb plants are coming up under the protective leaves from the fall.  I am purging and spring cleaning.  I am going to spruce up my daughter's bike and ride it about the city,.  I am going to camp a few times this summer..  The sun is warm through the window.  Yes, I am fine.

Riding

 I went to the farm today to ride.  I had to take a hiatus from riding for a few months to allow healing from surgery so it was my first riding lesson in forever. My riding lesson tonight was not too brilliant.  I am so unsure of myself!  I have a new riding instructor and she had me ride a huge horse I have never ridden before.  I didn't know which pads, shims, saddle, girth or bridle to use nor how long to make the stirrups.  I felt so needy.  I walked Grey, did some 2 point exercises, managed to trot a couple steps.  My teacher asked if the lesson was okay.  I wish the lesson had gone better.  Oh well.  Lifestyle changes to lower my weight and cholesterol and keep heartburn away are in process and quite successful.  The purpose is to avoid cholesterol medication.  I watch what I eat, do cardio and some strength/toning/firming.